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Apr
04
2012

On Meditation

With your eyes gently closed begin to take your awareness inwards, focusing on your breath the inhalation and the exhalation…a conscious flow inhalation and a conscious flow exhalation. Invite yourself to focus simply on your breathing. If your mind wanders off just bring it back to your breath. Our mind can wander off and without judgment just bring it back and watch your breathing. Feel your breath. Feeling air going in through your nostrils and as you breathe out air leaving your nostrils and going through all the tiny hairs of your upper lip. Allow yourself to be particularly aware of your breath in and your breath out.

Tags: awareness, breath, inhalation and exhalation, meditation
Posted in Meditation | No Comments »

Apr
02
2012

Feeling Judged? Maybe it is time to re-author a new story for yourself by Dan Beauvais

“Narrative therapists are interested in joining with people to explore the stories they have about their lives and relationships, their effects, their meanings and the context in which they have been formed and authored.”

Alice Morgan from What is Narrative Therapy?

Have you ever felt that you being too hard on yourself?  That personal critical judgment has become overwhelming?  There are reasons why this happens.  From the time we are born, we learn our culture codes through imitation – we copy what we watch and hear.  It is ritual observance.  We learn from those who learned before – to walk, dress, use good table manners, how socialize in public, settle conflicts, etc.

Our observing practice includes engaging in a ritual of ongoing internalized conversation with ourselves as a way of measuring ourselves against the external world, and trying to determine if we fit in or are acceptable to others.  The culture codes we adopt for ourselves represent the rules we use to judge our self worth and who we are as a person.  These rules form the stories we live by and inform how we make meaning of the world around us.

Often we are recruited into adopting stories about ourselves where we don’t feel like we quite “measure up”.  This can happen when we enter in a new relationship, when our social environment changes, or at a time when we are undergoing personal changes in our own lives.  The ritual of practicing internalized conversations combined with adopting marginalizing stories about ourselves, leaves us vulnerable to negative self-judgment; to the point where we can’t see anything but the “flaws” that we use to begin to define who we are.

To overcome these debilitating self-judgments I have found it very useful to understand and challenge how this problem saturated story was manufactured.  Secondly, engage in re-remembering practices where you are able to identify preferred ways of being that fit with your authentic voice.  Challenge those codes, rules and points of reference that you have been using to judge yourself and return to your preferred way of being.

Tags: authentic voice, critical judgement, culture, Dan Beauvais, measure up, personal judgement, ritual observance, self-judgement
Posted in Self Growth | No Comments »

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Beverley Pugh

Beverley Pugh

Beverley Pugh has international experience in Individual, Marital and Family Therapist services. Areas of practice include counselling in: individual, couples, family, anxiety, addictions, grief, depression, pain management, multicultural, workplace and others.

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We are all in need of ensuring there is balance inside of us. Our minds, emotions, and bodies need balance in order to thrive.

The gift in all of this is that we have the capacity and the skills to do it. Sports, music, an exercise program, meditation, qigong, dance, art... all of our passions bring in a balance to our systems. We want to team up our passions with our intention for balance, and ensure that there is time in our lives for us to play with our passions. This means taking action. It is important for all of us to move beyond our good intentions, and take action to look after ourselves. Balance is one of the key action steps that is needed. Our passions take us into a different part of ourselves, and it is like having a wonderful holiday. It builds our vitality.

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Our ability, as parents, to support our children to thrive in stressful situations is becoming more and more important. Children need very specific tools in their self regulation 'tool kits' that they can draw upon to support their success, and trusted adults to coach them in their use. But what are these tools and how to we teach them effectively to our kids?

Thankfully, there is Beverley Pugh! Bev takes a curious and calm approach to supporting children and parents with this journey. She is passionately invested in teaching parents and children ways to reduce anxiety and approach life positively and confidently. Bev is a master of her craft - she draws on years of her own experience as a parent and counsellor to work effectively and respectfully with children and their parents. I have thoroughly enjoyed Bev's recent workshops for parents and children and recommend them to anyone willing to explore specific strategies to help their children thrive at home, at school and in their community.

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About Beverley

Beverley Pugh has international experience in Individual, Marital and Family Therapist services. Areas of practice include counselling in: individual, couples, family, anxiety, addictions, grief, depression, pain management, multicultural, workplace and others.

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604-925-1513
Email:
bev@beverleypugh.com
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V7T 1B8
Canada

Disclaimer: The information presented on this site about various psychological conditions, is of a general nature and is not a substitute for an assessment by a competent therapist and/or medical professional. If you believe that you or an important person in your life is in need of an intervention please seek qualified help as soon as possible.

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