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Jan
30
2015

Four Letter Word

Four Letter Word blog“There are some four letter words that hold more value than others.” – Beverley Pugh

There are many four letter words in the English language. I know because I have used them all. There is, however, one that has grown in meaning and value over the years…and that word is LOVE. This word gets thrown around a lot. I would like to take it to the core level.

“All love is self-love.” That is a rather strong statement. I remember hearing it years ago and reacting to it. I thought it was a very narcissistic way of looking at love. I loved my dog, but what does that have to do with self-love?

Now, over the years of life experience, I totally get it.

Love has many nuances. Some of us feel love. Some of us want love from others. It serves many purposes. It can have the spin of:  I need to be loved in order to feel lovable. I need to be loved in order to feel safe. I need to feel loved in order to feel important, or that I matter. I certainly went through a period where my self-validation was dependent on external circumstances…like friends or work or performance. I sometimes fall back there. To some people love becomes a way of defining ourselves and our value.

So what have I learned about love over the years and am still learning? Love is a formless aspect of ourselves. We have aspects of who we are that have form…our nose, our ears etc. But love is formless. It emanates from within us. When I look at my children I feel such love – a flow that starts from within me. It’s a gift we are born with.

We humans have given so many spins and meaning to the word love…proof of our safety, of our value, of our importance, etc.

When I experience it in its purest form, it is simply this beautiful warm energy that flows within me. Usually in appreciation for something or someone. It is generated from within. I gaze at the ocean, the birds, the trees, and I take time to breathe and notice. That inner smile begins within me.

I know as a parent my children know and feel when I am radiating love, so to speak. I am not talking the story or needing the story. I am just feeling love and radiating it. I am sure that over the years they have picked up on it. It’s another way for them to experience love – to see and feel as a state of being rather than something you get from someone else.

I know than when I am consciously aware of feeling love, I can hold compassion for myself…and forgiveness and inspiration. It is all in there. We come with the package…like it’s waiting for us to open it.

What would life be like without the feeling and thought that we have to prove ourselves; prove our value? How much more relaxed and less fearful we would be. Our creativity would flow more easily without the worry and angst.

This February give yourself a Valentines card. That is what I am doing. I am worth it! How about you?

Tags: compassion, forgiveness, happiness, inspiration, love, relaxation
Posted in Love | 4 Comments »

Jan
30
2015

Self Love and What it Means to Me…

Self Love blogBy Donna

 
“You gotta get up, dress up and show up.” – Donna

I have never given much thought to this topic and I suppose if I had skimmed over it in my mind I likely would have conjured it up to be a somewhat selfish notion, or even a narcissistic type of idea… to love oneself.  Well, I have now learned that it is anything but… as to love oneself is actually a gift to your loved ones and even to society itself… you become more self-sufficient, no emotional burden to your friends and family and so much freer in turn to give, to be kind, to be honest and to be present!

I am understanding more and more that it really is all about the journey, the “right here; the right now”.  I think as you love yourself you can accept and absolutely welcome that what else is there really, but to make the most of this life right now!

The action to take is simple in my mind and it has been said before:  You gotta get up, dress up and show up!  When you show up be open to all the surprises life has to offer… it’s a fascinating ride!

Tags: acceptance, emotions, family, happiness, health, love, self-growth
Posted in Love | No Comments »

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Beverley Pugh

Beverley Pugh

Beverley Pugh has international experience in Individual, Marital and Family Therapist services. Areas of practice include counselling in: individual, couples, family, anxiety, addictions, grief, depression, pain management, multicultural, workplace and others.

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Gratitude...No Matter What

Ask yourself if you are "routining" gratitude or whether it is part of your moment to moment way of being. Invite yourself to become curious about what it would feel like to LIVE gratitude. Notice what happens when your heart is open to feeling gratitude. Notice if your energy goes up, your mood improves, your parenting is different, or your decision-making is stronger. Even when you’re angry and cheesed off, can you hold a perspective of the bigger picture and gratitude? Having gratitude, no matter what, means that you still feel all your emotions, but always hold gratitude in in a corner of your awareness. You may find that all your coping skills and capacity for wisdom increase dramatically. You are increasing your personal power. Keep practicing holding gratitude in all moments, and notice how you experience life differently and with less stress.

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About Beverley

Beverley Pugh has international experience in Individual, Marital and Family Therapist services. Areas of practice include counselling in: individual, couples, family, anxiety, addictions, grief, depression, pain management, multicultural, workplace and others.

Contact

Telephone:
604-925-1513
Email:
bev@beverleypugh.com
Location:
120-1451 Marine Drive
West Vancouver, BC
V7T 1B8
Canada

Disclaimer: The information presented on this site about various psychological conditions, is of a general nature and is not a substitute for an assessment by a competent therapist and/or medical professional. If you believe that you or an important person in your life is in need of an intervention please seek qualified help as soon as possible.

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