“You have the perfect mother. I am responsible for all your problems, and you’re responsible for the solutions.” ~ Byron Katie
Byron Katie is well known for her quotes. For those of you who haven’t read her books, I would recommend them. This is how I see the meaning of this quote. Like you, I was profoundly influenced by my parents and family while growing up. As most of us do, I took on their beliefs and also made conclusions about life at an early age. These were not consciously chosen beliefs. They were conclusions a young child would make from the mind of a child.
Now as a mature adult (who is still evolving), it is my responsibility to reassess all my beliefs and the stories I have around them. Hanging on to these stories would leave me in a stuck place in many ways.
In my practice I have heard the word freedom so often. Probably it’s the most frequently articulated word.
From my perspective, freedom is found in our own relationship with ourselves. Or it certainly starts there. The freedom to challenge and let go of old patterns that clearly don’t serve us. As adults we are all in this place of freedom. Freedom is about all of us reflecting what we really want, then looking inside ourselves and housecleaning. It’s our responsibility.
Usually we are externally focused… waiting for an outside change. It’s called “blaming” or “finger pointing”. That is not how freedom is created. Freedom starts with us facing us. You facing you. Me facing me. We are the solution, as Bryon Katie said in her quote.
Use your knowledge wisely about your upbringing. It can be valuable to go back and understand the beliefs of your parents. It is our job as adults to sort through and let go of what doesn’t serve us anymore. Learn new habits and build muscle around those new habits, so you can hold them consistently.
We are the solution. We have been given free will to become part of the solution. Pass this on to your children!
