Mastery of Health and Happiness
  • Home
  • Who am I
  • What is Mastery?
  • Pearls of Wisdom
  • Media
  • Store
  • Newsletter
  • Contact
Apr
04
2017

Give Yourself a 5-Star Rating for Self-Forgiveness

Self-Forgiveness

“Living in the experience of freedom involves self-forgiveness.”  ~ Bev Pugh

What is the worst thing you have ever done? We all harbour our secrets, our moments of feeling ‘bad’ when we did something we think we shouldn’t have, or didn’t do something we think we should have. Self-forgiveness is one of the biggest aspects of our self-growth and personal expansion. We can lock ourselves away for a long time in very non-forgiving place. But this has the effect of depleting our energy, and taking a toll on our mood. It also limits our creativity.

This is my take on self-forgiveness.

Guilt, shame and remorse are very dense places to live. They lower our vibrancy in every way – health, personal power, relationships, creativity, joy – to name a few!

When you think of the worst thing you ever did, take a moment to explore the thoughts and beliefs that were behind it in that moment. Whether or not you believe them now, you believed them at that time. In that moment, that was who you were.

We have all been there. It is part of the human experience. I know I have certainly been there. There are many reasons why in that moment, we thought the way we did. It’s important to understand that you were in an honest place with yourself – albeit, a misdirected one. Now you are in a place where you can challenge those old thoughts and beliefs. You are in a different moment.

Challenging our thoughts and beliefs when we are living in a way we don’t like is crucial to our growth. And challenging without judgment is even more crucial.

To spend our valuable energy thinking about a past through our distorted thoughts and judgments doesn’t make sense. It is imagined, not real. We begin to see it how it ‘should have been’ and then that becomes real in our minds. It’s not. The only thing that was real was that we meant well. All of us mean well. If we screw up it isn’t because we didn’t mean well, we were in an honest place with ourselves, but as I said earlier… misdirected.

If you hurt someone, then make amends to them and yourself from your heart. You now have more clarity about how you don’t want to live. How valuable is that?

Once we have challenged a situation and our beliefs in a moment, those teaching moments bring us clarity. Unfortunately, many of us get trapped in judgment and miss the incredible power in all these beautiful teaching moments.

How else do we move forward?

We are all of equal value. We are all of equal wisdom. We just need to allow for more breadth of awareness, and that comes not from judgment, but from forgiveness.

 

Tags: awareness, Bev Pugh, forgiveness, growth, guilt, happiness, health, honest, judgement
Posted in forgiveness | No Comments »

Jan
30
2015

Four Letter Word

Four Letter Word blog“There are some four letter words that hold more value than others.” – Beverley Pugh

There are many four letter words in the English language. I know because I have used them all. There is, however, one that has grown in meaning and value over the years…and that word is LOVE. This word gets thrown around a lot. I would like to take it to the core level.

“All love is self-love.” That is a rather strong statement. I remember hearing it years ago and reacting to it. I thought it was a very narcissistic way of looking at love. I loved my dog, but what does that have to do with self-love?

Now, over the years of life experience, I totally get it.

Love has many nuances. Some of us feel love. Some of us want love from others. It serves many purposes. It can have the spin of:  I need to be loved in order to feel lovable. I need to be loved in order to feel safe. I need to feel loved in order to feel important, or that I matter. I certainly went through a period where my self-validation was dependent on external circumstances…like friends or work or performance. I sometimes fall back there. To some people love becomes a way of defining ourselves and our value.

So what have I learned about love over the years and am still learning? Love is a formless aspect of ourselves. We have aspects of who we are that have form…our nose, our ears etc. But love is formless. It emanates from within us. When I look at my children I feel such love – a flow that starts from within me. It’s a gift we are born with.

We humans have given so many spins and meaning to the word love…proof of our safety, of our value, of our importance, etc.

When I experience it in its purest form, it is simply this beautiful warm energy that flows within me. Usually in appreciation for something or someone. It is generated from within. I gaze at the ocean, the birds, the trees, and I take time to breathe and notice. That inner smile begins within me.

I know as a parent my children know and feel when I am radiating love, so to speak. I am not talking the story or needing the story. I am just feeling love and radiating it. I am sure that over the years they have picked up on it. It’s another way for them to experience love – to see and feel as a state of being rather than something you get from someone else.

I know than when I am consciously aware of feeling love, I can hold compassion for myself…and forgiveness and inspiration. It is all in there. We come with the package…like it’s waiting for us to open it.

What would life be like without the feeling and thought that we have to prove ourselves; prove our value? How much more relaxed and less fearful we would be. Our creativity would flow more easily without the worry and angst.

This February give yourself a Valentines card. That is what I am doing. I am worth it! How about you?

Tags: compassion, forgiveness, happiness, inspiration, love, relaxation
Posted in Love | 4 Comments »

  1. 1
  2. 2
  3. 3
  4. 4
  5. NEXT

Beverley Pugh

Beverley Pugh

Beverley Pugh has international experience in Individual, Marital and Family Therapist services. Areas of practice include counselling in: individual, couples, family, anxiety, addictions, grief, depression, pain management, multicultural, workplace and others.

Join Our Mailing List

Mastery Practice Tool

In your opinion, what is the worst thing you have ever done? Take some time to find that moment before you read on.

Now go back to what your beliefs or your thoughts were in that moment. Know that at that time, you believed them. They ‘ran’ you.

We all mean well. It is part of who we are. You acted that way because you truly believed the thoughts and beliefs.

Challenge them now to see if there is truth in those beliefs. Take your time. Many of our beliefs do not hold truth. Be grateful and smile because there is more clarity about how you don’t want to live, which means there is more insight on how you do want to live. This is a powerful lesson! Reset your compass, stay vigilant and see things shift for you.

Testimonial

My daughter, Trinity, attended her first Children’s Empowerment Workshop and she loved it! It has helped her deal with some of the real anxieties that all children go through - from the not so nice kid at school, to the imagination that runs away with her at night time, when we are getting ready for bed.

She practices her rooting and the different breathing techniques that she has learned, and has become stronger and more confident in dealing with different situations.

Pauline M.

Archives

  • May 2018 (1)
  • March 2018 (1)
  • January 2018 (1)
  • December 2017 (1)
  • November 2017 (1)
  • October 2017 (1)
  • September 2017 (1)
  • August 2017 (1)
  • July 2017 (1)
  • June 2017 (1)
  • May 2017 (1)
  • April 2017 (1)
  • March 2017 (1)
  • February 2017 (1)
  • January 2017 (1)
  • December 2016 (1)
  • November 2016 (1)
  • October 2016 (1)
  • September 2016 (1)
  • August 2016 (1)
  • July 2016 (1)
  • June 2016 (2)
  • May 2016 (2)
  • April 2016 (2)
  • March 2016 (2)
  • February 2016 (2)
  • January 2016 (2)
  • December 2015 (2)
  • November 2015 (2)
  • October 2015 (2)
  • September 2015 (2)
  • August 2015 (2)
  • July 2015 (2)
  • June 2015 (2)
  • May 2015 (2)
  • April 2015 (2)
  • March 2015 (2)
  • January 2015 (4)
  • December 2014 (2)
  • November 2014 (2)
  • October 2014 (2)
  • September 2014 (2)
  • August 2014 (2)
  • July 2014 (2)
  • June 2014 (2)
  • May 2014 (2)
  • April 2014 (2)
  • March 2014 (2)
  • February 2014 (2)
  • January 2014 (2)
  • December 2013 (2)
  • November 2013 (2)
  • October 2013 (2)
  • September 2013 (3)
  • August 2013 (1)
  • July 2013 (2)
  • June 2013 (2)
  • May 2013 (1)
  • April 2013 (2)
  • March 2013 (2)
  • February 2013 (2)
  • January 2013 (2)
  • December 2012 (2)
  • November 2012 (2)
  • October 2012 (2)
  • September 2012 (4)
  • August 2012 (3)
  • July 2012 (3)
  • June 2012 (3)
  • May 2012 (3)
  • April 2012 (4)
  • March 2012 (3)
  • February 2012 (3)
  • January 2012 (2)

Categories

  • awareness (30)
  • Balance (8)
  • change (16)
  • Choice (28)
  • Feeling Gratitude (14)
  • forgiveness (8)
  • Gentleness (10)
  • healing (17)
  • Health and Happiness (35)
  • Health and Wellness (18)
  • holding power (9)
  • Inspirational (32)
  • Learning to Adapt (18)
  • Love (30)
  • managing emotions (20)
  • Meditation and Relaxation (15)
  • Parenting (6)
  • Pearls of Wisdom (21)
    • Breathing (3)
    • Creating What You Want (4)
    • Gratitude (6)
    • Happiness (7)
    • Heart Space (2)
    • Meditation (2)
  • Relationships (4)
  • Self Growth (57)
  • Stress (3)
  • transitions (6)
  • Uncategorized (3)

About Beverley

Beverley Pugh has international experience in Individual, Marital and Family Therapist services. Areas of practice include counselling in: individual, couples, family, anxiety, addictions, grief, depression, pain management, multicultural, workplace and others.

Contact

Telephone:
604-925-1513
Email:
bev@beverleypugh.com
Location:
120-1451 Marine Drive
West Vancouver, BC
V7T 1B8
Canada

Disclaimer: The information presented on this site about various psychological conditions, is of a general nature and is not a substitute for an assessment by a competent therapist and/or medical professional. If you believe that you or an important person in your life is in need of an intervention please seek qualified help as soon as possible.

(c) 2023. Beverley Pugh Counselling Services. All Rights Reserved. Site Designed by Pureze Web Media.