Christmas can be a special time of refection. It can be a very emotional time for some of us. With the passing of my brother, it holds a very heart-based meaning.

This season has many different meanings for so many of us. For some, it is a time for prayer, and family, holidaying, lights, music, friendship and love. There is so much commercialization; it can make it a hectic season. I know that some just endure. What meaning are you giving to this Christmas?

Sentiment can take us to so many different places. It can lead us to think that there is something wrong with the present. I know. I have been there. My brother should be here. He loved life, and his family so he should be here. So who says he should be here? ME! So what kind of God am I? One that wants things to be a certain way.

This got me thinking…am I only wise when things go my way? I have had to work through this one. Can you relate?

So I go to the theme of “love what is”. That is a tough one when you are cheesed off with the powers that be. I have been working it through because I am determined to grow through life events, rather than stay stuck.

For me, it is interesting where grief has taken me this Christmas. I feel the willingness to go to a place of deep gratitude. I thought I did that before, but now I realize there was a part of me that was conditional about it.

When times are rocky, our thinking mind goes to all the rocks and that becomes the focus of our attention. The gift in life is to learn how to acknowledge and feel the rocks, but keep a wide angle lens on your attention so you can hold a larger perspective.

So I took to refocusing my attention, and therefore my mind, on what is good in this moment now. There were moments when the only thing that was good was the chocolate bar in my purse. As I keep refocusing my attention with the tenacity that I love about myself, I started to go deeper than gratitude and deeper than appreciation. This deep appreciation took me to what is noticed and acknowledged in the present moment that brought a smile to my face. Like my face cream, or the carrot I was chopping, and that my lungs work when I breathe, and the trees and the people I love, and who love me. I began to let go of the conditional part of me. I will only be appreciative if it is good.

I realized on a deeper level that we take so very much for granted. When we take things for granted we can be in our own emotional addictions like worry, or negativity, or busyness or whatever is there for you. It keeps us heavy.

Freedom is light…it’s feeling light. A deep appreciation for everything that is here is a beautiful way of being. We can often talk of gratitude from our deeds, rather than our hearts. It is essential that we FEEL it in the moment. That our hearts open and we FEEL it.

How do you feel it? Think about moments in your life when you have felt gratitude…and pause and take time to revisit it and really FEEL it. Now bring that feeling forward to the NOW. Your mind may have opinions like “I am too annoyed to feel gratitude”, or another emotion getting in the way. Say to yourself “That is just my mind, and I am so very much more than my mind”.

I open my heart to gratitude for this beautiful tree or flower or animal or bath. This is how we live a life of appreciation, rather than scarcity thinking.

This month can be a month of celebration…of open hearts, of smiles, of deep appreciation for what is.

I just received a lovely card and it said…”Sorrow does not last forever, but memories do and so does love”.

I smiled when I read it.

If any of you are feeling heavy this season, say to yourself….”Just for right now, in this moment, I am going to move into appreciation”. That is all our lives are…moment after moment after moment.

We all have our stories, but I encourage all of you to let the lights and music and love in this season to OPEN you up to everything that is HERE now.