Carpe Diem! (Seize the Day)
Transitions are a challenging time. They are both opportunities as well as tough.
As our lives are designed, the potential for growth in transitions is huge. Most of us get stuck in habit and resistance because it is a comfortable place to be.
On a personal note, I have had three major transitions in four months and each one has had its own challenges. For each, I have had some suffering, some reflection, a lot of breaths, creative inspiration, creative action, and then peace (although I still carry some band aids on the first one). Let me share with you more about this transition process.
In June, a dear friend passed. We had known each other for 30 years. Her illness was a transition for both of us. Her passing was a transition for both of us. Now there is a space in my life that is different.
In July I took a long vacation. This was a transition for me because I arrived on my vacation “out of my body”. I invited myself to relax and just be. It wasn’t that simple. I was still geared up. The transition into “being” did happen, but with a great deal of creative awareness, inspiration, and action.
In September I began to work again. This felt like a Tsunami, gearing up again. Many of you may feel that this month of September is a month of starting again. It involves planning, organizing, goal setting, implementing, balancing, etc, etc, etc. Again for me I have had to take myself through the steps of transition and now as I write to you I am happy to report that I am good.
What are the steps of transition?
In my experience this is how I would describe them:
1. Let yourself feel. Know how you feel and stay with all of these feelings for a while. Most of us fly through our feelings or try to avoid them and we stay aimed at our destination. In truth, we don’t really allow ourselves to feel what’s real. We can be good at distractions, TV, cell phones, computers, alcohol, food, relationships. What is important is to be able to sit with your feelings and keep sitting until they are clear and you can feel them in your body. Sometimes I write in order to ground myself.
2. Be honest. We all do self-deceit well. Be honest with the full breadth of how you are feeling and what is going on.
3. Breathe. This is a big transition. We so often hold our breath and breathe in a shallow way. This keeps us stuck, small, constricted, and on the treadmill. Transition is about growing and expanding. Our breath is meant to help us with this.
4. Reflect on the full meaning this transition holds for you. Here’s an example. When I had young kids, I would see September as a month when I wanted to get it right for them (and for me). I would tend to put a lot of pressure on myself to get it “right”. Stepping back and reflecting allows for space between you and what’s happening. It allows for perspective. It’s by moving into perspective that we can connect to the unlimited possibilities that exist in the big picture of life.
5. Creative Inspiration. I love that “pop” of awareness when I get an “ah ha” moment. If you are breathing and opening up your body and mind through exercise, there are moments of “higher awareness”. This is available to all of us. I carry a little inspiration journal in my bag.
6. Creative action. In each transition, it is important to take action. Here are some examples. In the instance of my friend who recently passed, I did a lot of anger release work, grounding, and meditation. I spent a lot of time looking up rather than down. I only did what actually gave me more energy. This is how I knew I was on the right track. For the second transition of moving into “being”, I did a lot of walking. I felt restless so I walked slowly barefoot on the sand, and always with awareness. I breathed in the beauty of nature as I walked. I actually listened to my own CD – ‘Feeling Calm Within’ – about five times and worked every exercise until it was part of me. I successfully “transisted”, if there is such a word. If not, we’ve coined a new word.
For September, I know the importance of slowing down, and breathing, and allowing for quiet moments to reflect on what is truly important for me. I’m also aware of the old habits that could trip me up. It’s like an airplane pilot. Before he or she gets on the plane, they take the time to do a full checkup. That’s what I recommend we all do this September. I am happy to report that by following these guidelines, I have now landed on my feet.
Transitions are a natural part of life. If you go through them awake, alert, and clear with your intentions, growth is possible. Old fears, habits, and obstacles will come up again. As they do for all of us. Transitions allow us an opportunity to down regulate the hold that these old habits have on us.
I wonder what transitions are you now facing or experiencing? My wish for you is creative growth as you go through them.
Enjoy September and a creative year from September to June for all of us.
I Bev, Thanks for sharing. I have been through big transitions too this year and I recently felt like I just wanted to “cocoon” for awhile – so I can relate to the “Let yourself feel” and “Breathe” stages. It feels really good to let myself do that before I move on. I’m happy to hear you have landed on your feet:))
Thanks for sharing your own story Heidi. Yes, letting yourself feel whatever it is you are feeling really can help….and well I can’t say enough about how much breathing can help a person get through any experience.
Bev